5th Annual DWTS Rankdown: Speed Run Edition

[*Wallace]

Sara Evans

 

LOL there are still so many celebs I want to cut that I am really confused on which direction to go on. I could have with another super early boot but I wanted to change it up a bit with someone who lasted around mid-season whom I wasn't really a fan of, so I have chosen Sara Evans. Sara Evans is a country music singer who was partnered with Tony Dovolani on the 3rd season of Dancing with the Stars. Sara is a well known and successful country singer and has done well in her career, but her time as a dancer on DWTS was pretty average. I thought she had a few decent dances, some average dances, some bad dances, so kind of a mixed bag - but she never really had that standout dance like most of the Top 8 (sans Jerry Springer) had. She danced the following: a Foxtrot (15), Mambo (21), Jive (25), Paso Doble (20) and Samba (24).  Her Foxtrot was bad and I thought her Paso Doble was dreadful. I remember she had no performance skills or connection to the dance and seemed a bit dragged around. Her Mambo & Samba were okay/cute dances. Her "These Boots Were Made for Walking" Jive was really cute and her best dance for sure. I don't know about the 9 it got, but the 8s were fair. Sara withdrew from the show at Week 6, due to the divorce she was going through which was really sad for her to go through.  I don't know what's going on in her personal life but hope all is well with her. I simply just wasn't a fan of her run on the show (sans her Jive) so I'm fine with her going now.

[QueenKalie]

7 minutes ago, *Wallace said:

Sara Evans

 

LOL there are still so many celebs I want to cut that I am really confused on which direction to go on. I could have with another super early boot but I wanted to change it up a bit with someone who lasted around mid-season whom I wasn't really a fan of, so I have chosen Sara Evans. Sara Evans is a country music singer who was partnered with Tony Dovolani on the 3rd season of Dancing with the Stars. Sara is a well known and successful country singer and has done well in her career, but her time as a dancer on DWTS was pretty average. I thought she had a few decent dances, some average dances, some bad dances, so kind of a mixed bag - but she never really had that standout dance like most of the Top 8 (sans Jerry Springer) had. She danced the following: a Foxtrot (15), Mambo (21), Jive (25), Paso Doble (20) and Samba (24).  Her Foxtrot was bad and I thought her Paso Doble was dreadful. I remember she had no performance skills or connection to the dance and seemed a bit dragged around. Her Mambo & Samba were okay/cute dances. Her "These Boots Were Made for Walking" Jive was really cute and her best dance for sure. I don't know about the 9 it got, but the 8s were fair. Sara withdrew from the show at Week 6, due to the divorce she was going through which was really sad for her to go through.  I don't know what's going on in her personal life but hope all is well with her. I simply just wasn't a fan of her run on the show (sans her Jive) so I'm fine with her going now.

Imagine participating in the country music rankdown and making cuts like this!

[jarmon]

DOROTHY HAMILL

Dorothy Hamill is a retired American figure skater. She is the 1976 Olympic champion and the 1976 World champion in ladies' singles. She was on the sixteenth season of Dancing with the Stars, where she was partnered with Tristan MacManus. The poor guy kept getting stuck with all the old women . After only two dances, she was forced to withdraw from the competition upon advice from her spine surgeon due to a severe strain on her lower back sustained during practice. She was able to score a decent 21 for her Contemporary to "Tiny Dancer" but then fell to the bottom of the leaderboard with her Jive to "Chantilly Lace" only scoring 15. She showed some potential and probably would've outlasted some of these other celebs had she not withdrew from the competition. I would honestly love to see a season where everyone who withdrew from the competition gets a second chance. 

[FrogLenzen]

Shannen Doherty

 

Shannen was the first boot of Season 4 10. She was with Mark. She got to dance twice and was never the lowest scoring dancer of the week. However, she didn't pick up enough votes and was kicked to the curb before the likes of Buzz and Kate. She's been in iconic roles in stuff like Little House on the Prairie, Heathers, and of course 90201.  I'm not seeing any major recent scandals by her or anything like that. She's getting cut purely because she was a first boot. Who will be the winner for the first boots??? Does Pamela Anderson count as a first boot? Stay tuned for the answers to those questions and more.

Edited July 22, 2022 by FrogLenzen

[jarmon]

1 minute ago, FrogLenzen said:

Shannen Doherty

 

Shannen was the first boot of Season 4. She was with Mark. She got to dance twice and was never the lowest scoring dancer of the week. However, she didn't pick up enough votes and was kicked to the curb before the likes of Buzz and Kate. She's been in iconic roles in stuff like Little House on the Prairie, Heathers, and of course 90201.  I'm not seeing any major recent scandals by her or anything like that. She's getting cut purely because she was a first boot. Who will be the winner for the first boots??? Does Pamela Anderson count as a first boot? Stay tuned for the answers to those questions and more.

I think you mean first boot of Season 10 

[FrogLenzen]

2 minutes ago, jarmon said:

I think you mean first boot of Season 10 

I may or may not have initially considered Paulina lmao

[Elliott]

Never forget when @*Wallacesaid Shannen was his least favourite Mark partner and we all dragged him for it.

[*Wallace]

54 minutes ago, QueenKalie said:

Imagine participating in the country music rankdown and making cuts like this!

Lol I make my decisions based on how I enjoy them on the show, not what I think of them outside of the show.  Although I'm not reallly taht familiar with Sara Evans' career. It was just a matter of time of when I was going to cut Sara as I was debating on her and many others for days now.

 

2 minutes ago, Elliott said:

Never forget when @*Wallacesaid Shannen was his least favourite Mark partner and we all dragged him for it.

I still stand by it.  

 

Although I do prefer Shannen over Bristol's S15 run, so balancing Bristol's two season run made things complicated.  

[*Chris]

 

Misty May-Treanor came to prominence after her gold winning performance at the 2004 Olympics ; For those unaware, she is a beach volleyball player where she set plenty of records with her partner.  Following her 2nd gold at the 2008 olympics, she was cast as the token olympian on the 7th season of Dancing With The Stars where she was partnered with the one and only, Maksim Chmerkovskiy.  She started the competition with a decent Foxtrot and followed it with a Mambo - both routines earned them a 21.  She remained consistent for the remainder of the competition until withdrawing from the competition in Week 3 after rupturing her achilles tendon during a rehearsal for her Jive.  I do believe she could have been a contender had she remained in the show but it is what it is.

Following DWTS, she went on to win another gold at the 2012 Olympics and retiring shortly after.  In 2018, she was appointed by Trump to the President's Council on Sports, Fitness, and Nutrition where she served as co-chair alongside Mariano Rivera - former athlete who endorsed Trump - and Herschel Walker - former athlete who endorsed Trump and running as a Republican in Georgia ; With this appointment, it does appear that she was a supporter of Trump as the President do tend to appoint individuals who either supported or donated to their campaign.

[*Amanda]

Doug Flutie

 

 

For season 22, the show runners decided that the one obligatory football player per season wasn't enough and decided to up the number of football players to 3. Doug Flutie was one of them. As far as dancing goes, Doug was the worst of the 3. He was partnered with Karina, who has had her fair share of duds over the years. His lowest score was a 15 for his Foxtrot. That was his week 1 dance, so at least his scores got better from there. His highest score from the 3-judge panel was a 21 for his Bollywood. DWTS was really trying to channel its inner SYTYCD that week by having all sorts of non-Ballroom styles - mainly Contemporary and Jazz because of course - but they still managed to shoehorn a Bollywood number in there. It was pretty awful. But we know that the judges are overly generous to mediocre men so I'm not surprised that they gave it a 21. The week prior, he managed to score a 28 (all 7's) when he danced a Tango for switch-up week and they randomly brought Maks on as a judge for that week. Doug was eliminated after that Bollywood routine. I was fine with that. We really needed to lose one of the football players by that point, as it was week 6 and all 3 were the 3 weakest dancers left in the competition by then. This was the last we saw of Karina as a pro; I'm sad she didn't get to go out on a higher note than this as she was one of my favorites. But uh, yeah, Doug wasn't good. And I want to get rid of as many dance bad dancers as possible to balance out the inevitable petty cuts of good dancers.

[Alex95]

Whenever someone cuts Nicole please use this tweet in your writeup

 

[Alex95]

Frankie Muniz

The Halloween Contemporary routine is the most overrated routine in DWTS history!!!! Is that the reason I'm cutting him? Mainly. Overall I don't think he was that great. Jordan, Lindsey, Vanessa, and Nikki all easily outclassed him all season long. Hell, I'll through Victoria in there too. Everyone thank Iman & Daniella for showing the world how a true Halloween Contemporary routine should be. Anyways, Frankie was on S25 of DWTS. He was an okay dancer and I don't think he gets enough backlash for undeservingly lasting too long. Everyone was too focused on the Jordan vs. Lindsey war (and I suppose Drew lasting too long) that Frankie kinda slipped UTR here. Hell if I wasn't in this game, I wouldn't be surprised if Frankie snuck through to the top 50 or something ridiculous. He looked very awkward in most of his movements and he did not have the strongest stage presence. I really wanted to root for Frankie! Malcolm in the Middle is one of my favorite shows and I was very excited about his casting. He just did not impress me at all. He's also very likely a Trumpie, at the very least his wife 100% is so he's complicit if you want to @ me for the cut

[Alex95]

Congrats to all the remaining dancers on making the top 200!

[Solaris]

Sasha Pieterse

 

 

When scrolling through the list of celebrities remaining, I see Sasha's name.  I figured, hey I don't know/remember who this is, so im going to cut them.  Maybe everyone else just forgot this person existed too, so I will do everyone the favor of having to do this write up.  Sasha was on season 25, and was partnered with Gleb.  Why do I not remember her?  She was in the competition for 5 weeks, and her highest score came about the week she was eliminated.  She received a 24 for her Rumba during Disney week.  Oh she got the same score the week prior for her foxtrot.  I don't know any of her dances and I don't care to watch them.

[taylorkat]

I didn't forget Sasha existed, she is on Pretty Little Liars, which is one of my favorite shows.

[Elliott]

@Alex95 saying Frankie would last too long in this as if we haven’t cut him early in the previous rankdowns for being a MAGAer. 

[taylorkat]

Terrell Owens

 

 

Terrell Eldorado (now there is an interesting middle name) Owens is a former NFL player that played for the Dallas Cowboys, philanthropist, entrepreneur, fitness expert, model, motivational speaker, humanitarian, and father. He does it all, apparently! Terrell was on Season 25 of Dancing with the Stars and his partner was Cheryl Burke. His lowest total score was a 15 for his Cha-Cha to Ain't Too Proud to Beg and his highest score was a 27 for his Jive to Feel It Still and a 27 for his Charleston to Bad Boy Good Man. He placed further than Vanessa Lachey and Nikki Bella, which I thought was gross. I think he is yet another mediocre dancer.

[*Wallace]

Melissa Gilbert

 

 

Melissa Gilbert is an actress, best known for starring Little House on the Prairie, who competed on the 14th season of Dancing with the Stars. Melissa was partnered with Maksim Chmerkovskiy. I found Melissa mostly to be alright/average at dancing. She seemed nice but she didn't really stand out to me for most of the season and lasted a little too long, imo. Melissa danced a Cha-Cha (20), Quickstep (20), Jive (24), Paso Doble (22), Salsa (21), Viennese Waltz (24), Argentine Tango (21), Team Paso Doble with Donald & William (26), Foxtrot (24) and Samba trio with Val (27). She was the lowest scorer for 4 of those routines. But yeah I didn't care for most of these routines. But I would say my favorites from here were her Viennese Waltz, Foxtrot and Paso Doble. I felt that Melissa kinda was overthinking and not really relaxed into the routines. Sometimes it seemed Maks would carry/drag her a bit through the routines. But she did showcase some growth in her latter dances that I mentioned. Melissa did last 5 weeks and ~supposedly made it to 5th place. I personally think of it as her placing 6th as Roshon was eliminated earlier that night and he deserves the higher ranking, imo.  I also would have preferred Jaleel to last longer too as I enjoyed his dancing more and also maybe Sherri too. But all in all, well done to Melissa making it through to the quarter finals and lasting 8 weeks.

[jarmon]

21 minutes ago, taylorkat said:

Terrell Owens

 

 

Terrell Eldorado (now there is an interesting middle name) Owens is a former NFL player that played for the Dallas Cowboys, philanthropist, entrepreneur, fitness expert, model, motivational speaker, humanitarian, and father. He does it all, apparently! Terrell was on Season 25 of Dancing with the Stars and his partner was Cheryl Burke. His lowest total score was a 15 for his Cha-Cha to Ain't Too Proud to Beg and his highest score was a 27 for his Jive to Feel It Still and a 27 for his Charleston to Bad Boy Good Man. He placed further than Vanessa Lachey and Nikki Bella, which I thought was gross. I think he is yet another mediocre dancer.

OMG LOL I was just about to come here and cut him because I wanted the triple cut from Season 25 with Frankie-Sasha-Terrell to happen LMAO thank you queen now I need to decide who to cut though instead 

[jarmon]

LOUIE VITO

Louis Philip "Louie" Vito III is an Italian-American professional snowboarder. He is an Olympian, Winter X Games, and U.S. Grand Prix Champion. He was on Season 9 of Dancing with the Stars which decided to have 16 celebrities for who know's why! Louie was partnered with Chelsie Hightower and they were the 8th couple eliminated as well placed 8th overall. Louie is the definition of mediocre dancer as his lowest score was a 16 and highest a 22 over a 6 week span on Dancing with the Stars. He tried but dancing just isn't for him. To be honest, dancing wasn't for a lot of the celebs on Season 9 lmao, a truly tragic season and one my least faves ever.

[FrogLenzen]

Mike Catherwood

 

Queen Lacey had just come off a season with Kyle as the runner-up, so of course they weren't going to give her another good dancer. In Season 12, she was paired with Psycho Mike, a guy from the radio. Unlike Bobby Bones, this radio personality did not excel on the program. He got the lowest scoring dance in week 1 and tied for the lowest scoring dance in week 2. He was the first one eliminated. Not even Lacey could save him. I don't know much about the guy, but his wiki doesn't have any separate headings for "Controversies" or "Arrests" or "Political Views" so I can only assume that he's a regular person. 

[*Chris]

 

Charo is an icon but she wasn't an icon on Dancing With The Stars - someone please explain to me how she managed to make the Top 200 while someone liek Zendaya didn't manage to crack the Top 200 ? Choices.  If you have been living under a rock, Charo is a Spanish-American actress that accomplished everything from acting to singing to comedy to flamenco guitarist - only thing she hasn't accomplished is ballroom dancing.  An excellent definition of a C-list celebrity, Charo finally appeared on the 24th season of the show after appearing on it as a guest a few seasons back.  She was partnered with Keo as the producers loved to assign him some fodders as his partners.  They danced a total of 3 dances until their elimination ; I will say Charo did better than expected but she wasn't a dancer - if she stayed, I doubt she would have gave us a MOMENT or give us a routine worthy of a 40 dances.  That being said, Charo will forever be an entertainer!

Edited July 23, 2022 by *Chris

[*Amanda]

Vernon Davis

 

 

Vernon has to be the most unremarkable and forgettable football player that the show has had. DeMarcus in the previous season wasn't that memorable either, but Vernon took it a step further. His season aired very recently and I cannot recall a single dance he did. I remember he was assigned "Be Our Guest" for Disney week which gave us the opportunity to stan Danica's iconic Quickstep to the same song in the live discussion thread. I also remember that he was in the bottom 2 with Jesse Metcalfe that one week and we were all living for Carrie Ann being forced to choose who to save between the 2 of them. His lowest score was a 17 for his Foxtrot. His highest score was a 22 for both his Quickstep and Rumba. For weeks 3-6, he consistently scored 21's and 22's and I'm sure I was raging at the judges giving him 7's and 8's for showing up because he's a football player while nitpicking Kaitlyn's great dances to death that season. Unsurprisingly, the 8's he did get all came from Carrie Ann. But, uh, he literally had no impact that season. He was partnered with Peta, he danced okay at best, and he was given decent scores because he's a man. Nothing he did really stood out or left an impression. And for that reason, I am cutting him from the Rankdown.

[taylorkat]

Kareem Abdul-Jabbar

 

 

Kareem Abdul-Jabbar (Ferdinand Lewis Alcindor, Jr.) is a former NBA player. He is the NBA's all-time leading scorer, a six-time NBA champion, and a six-time MVP. His Emmy winning sports documentary debuted as the most watched and highest rated of all-time. He was appointed to the Citizens Coin Advisory Council, where he helps decide on all coins that are to be minted in the United States. He was awarded the Presidential Medal of Freedom by former president Barack Obama. He's a legend. Kareem was on the athletes edition of Dancing with the Stars and his partner was Lindsay Arnold. He danced a Cha-Cha that received a total of 17 and a Salsa that received a total of 19, then, he was sent packing.

[*Wallace]

Debi Mazar

 

 

Debi Mazar is an actress, who competed on the 9th season of Dancing with the Stars, where she was partnered with Maksim Chmerkovskiy. Debi was alright but kinda forgettable on the show. She also kinda disappointed me personality-wise on the show because I know she's quite a strong no-nonsense kind of person (or at least what I know from her) and I was kinda hoping she would be someone to let Maks have it and banter off with him but that didn't really happen. But Debi did show a more vulnerable side to her, which I could appreciate. Her dances overall were a mixed bag. On Week 1, she danced a Salsa to "Complicación" that scored a 16, which wasn't really good. She earned 6 points and came in 3rd in the Foxtrot relay, and this was a better dance from her. I agreed with her placement there. On Week 2, she had her best dance with a Tango to "El Tango de Roxanne," which scored a 21. Not one of the very best dances to that song but this was a good Tango and easily her best dance. But then on Week 3, she danced a Samba to "Love Is in the Air," which scored a 17 and I thought this was simply not a good dance. Debi was eliminated after this dance. You could make a case that she should have lasted longer, as she showed good potential in ballroom. I wouldn't have minded her lasting a little longer but I was also okay with she left.