Video Game Rankdown Pt. 2

[Deeee]

Host Announcement

Time for Princess Peach to start the final rhythm of this level! PM me a direction Victoria!

Write-Ups Needed:

Victoria and Tom (one each):

Tomb Raider (multi-platform; 2013)
Horizon Zero Dawn (PS4; 2017)

[totes4totes]

I’ll do both missing write-ups tonight

[1234567890]

Victoria's dream come true. No write-ups.

 

I’ll do both missing write-ups tonight

Christmas came early. :santa:

[totes4totes]

Christmas came early. :santa:

It saves me from having to do my separate “Lara Croft is gay for Samantha Nishimura” tribute

[~Tom~]

I’ll do both missing write-ups tonight

#Bless

 

I’ll do both missing write-ups tonight

#Bless

 

using sacrifice to bring Radiant Dawn back. (Sorry Tom)

At least Radiant Dawn is back.

[Deeee]

Do I still have items or nah? :detective:

 

Correction: you do have an item. Megan took Rei's item instead. Your item is useless now, but will come into play after this level is over. I need you to send me a direction.

[Deeee]

Death Stranding is easily one of the most unique and amazing video game experiences ever. I finally finished. Wow.

[Solaris]

Death Stranding is easily one of the most unique and amazing video game experiences ever. I finally finished. Wow.

 

 

It looks cool, maybe when its like 5 dollars on Steam on day I will buy it.

[Deeee]

Host Announcement

Time to match the beat started by Princess Peach!

Ike -
Lara Croft -
Link -
Micaiah -
Pikachu -
SHODAN -

[.Rei]

Down

[Deeee]

It looks cool, maybe when its like 5 dollars on Steam on day I will buy it.

 

It's worth more than five dollars. LOL. But it is definitely not a game for everybody.

 

Ike -

Lara Croft -

Link - Down

Micaiah -

Pikachu -

SHODAN -

[Solaris]

It's worth more than five dollars. LOL. But it is definitely not a game for everybody.

 

 

I know but I don't have a PS4 anymore, so the only way I would try it is on Steam. And I would wait until its dirt cheap.

[Deeee]

I know but I don't have a PS4 anymore, so the only way I would try it is on Steam. And I would wait until its dirt cheap.

 

Fair enough. The game ends with a 2.5 hour cutscene.

 

[Solaris]

Fair enough. The game ends with a 2.5 hour cutscene.

 

 

:o Thats long.

[Deeee]

:o Thats long.

 

It’s necessary though? So hard to explain.

[1234567890]

Correction: you do have an item. Megan took Rei's item instead. Your item is useless now, but will come into play after this level is over. I need you to send me a direction.

[1234567890]

[Solaris]

 

 

 

I see Nico still hasn't posted, so I can't stalk his direction.

[totes4totes]

Tomb Raider
Or the game that made Lara Croft gay


The title is mostly a joke. But also kind of not! Lara Croft is, of course, not canonically gay. As long as games are designed with a straight male as the ideal audience, there will not be a canonically gay Lara Croft (just like there won't be a canonically gay Dante). However, unlike previous iterations of Lara Croft, there is a lot more fuel to the fire this time around. Particularly because the game's writer, Rhianna Pratchett (daughter of Terry), did give an interview where she said she tried to write Lara Croft as a lesbian. And even if that was off the cuff or a joke, it's not hard to see the bones of that story in the game.

On a side note, of course the Tomb Raider series comic book was handed off to Mariko Tamaki, famous for writing queer graphic novels like This One Summer and Skim and writing the novelizations of queer comic Lumberjanes. Bless that none of you can cut those comics which are truly my favorite part of the rebooted Lara Croft timeline.

So like I said, it's really not hard to draw a line between Lara Croft's rebooted 2013 portrayal and queerness.

And when I say the bones to a queer love story in Tomb Raider are already there, I mean it. These are actual unedited gifs.









All culimating with this gif for which there is no heterosexual explanation for the imagery:



But Megan, you say, these are all just gifs. Isolated moments. And don't forget, she also kisses a male on the cheek during the game!

To which I respond, the story of Tomb Raider (2013) is the story of Lara Croft and the crew (both of the ship and her archeological crew) getting stranded on an island called Yamatai. Here Lara has to fight her way through cultists to save her friends and escape the island. However, the emotional core of the story is driven by her desire to save Sam. Sam who is her best friend that calls her romantic pet names. There's other side characters, some which Lara is also emotionally attached to die, other who Lara is not as emotionally attached to live. For people who don't like to be spoiled I won't name who lives and dies. Canonically, Lara does not have many friends and is a nerd who loves books and artifacts more than she loves most people. However, she has one friend who didn't raise her or mentor her and that's Sam. And the reason they are on this (unfortunately for them disastrous) trip to Yamatai is because Sam wanted to help kickstart Lara's archeology career and secured the funding.

She kisses Alex on the cheek? The least sexual kiss imaginable? A full body hug is more sexual than a kiss on the cheek. Also Alex is dying and Lara knows that he has a crush on her. Might as well give him something nice as he dies. However, sad horny gamer boys are going to hold on to this so that they can masturbate to the fact that maybe in a different world Lara Croft will materialize and fall in love with them.

Also Lara now dresses like a lesbian.

Dee I know I wrote this one first but plz rank it higher than Horizon Zero Dawn for meaningless sentimentality. THX.

The end.

Edited December 11, 2019 by totes4totes

[Solaris]

I am just gonna post, can't wait all day to stalk one of megan/Nico again. They are prob waiting until I post anyway.

 

 

Ike -

Lara Croft -

Link - Down

Micaiah - Up

Pikachu -

SHODAN -

 

 

Good Tomb Raider write up, interesting read. Didn't realize there was an attempt at making Lara lesbian. Thats an interesting take.

[1234567890]

MEGAN.

[totes4totes]

If you google "Rhianna Pratchett Lara Croft Lesbian" you will find a lot of angry male gamers that are celebrating that she's no longer writing the games. Which should give you the answer on why Square Enix/Crystal Dynamics won't make Lara Croft canonically explicitly gay. (Although there's nothing that makes her explicitly straight or even explicitly attracted to men in the reboot either).

 

Good Tomb Raider write up, interesting read. Didn't realize there was an attempt at making Lara lesbian. Thats an interesting take.

It's not even an interesting take. It's an incredibly easy take to make if you play the games.

[NGM]

Ike -

Lara Croft -

Link - Down

Micaiah - Up

Pikachu -

SHODAN - Right

[Solaris]

If you google "Rhianna Pratchett Lara Croft Lesbian" you will find a lot of angry male gamers that are celebrating that she's no longer writing the games. Which should give you the answer on why Square Enix/Crystal Dynamics won't make Lara Croft canonically explicitly gay. (Although there's nothing that makes her explicitly straight or even explicitly attracted to men in the reboot either).

It's not even an interesting take. It's an incredibly easy take to make if you play the games.

 

 

I have only played the remake of the first one that was on the Wii.

[totes4totes]

I have only played the remake of the first one that was on the Wii.

I also discussed it before in this rankdown. So IDK what to tell you.

 

saying that Lara Croft is gay is no more or less interesting than calling Ike gay.