Alexa Wildish
November 3 at 8:59 AM
Refuge
I wrote this song many years ago and honestly waited a long while before I felt ready to share it. It felt far too exposing and raw. When I chose to release it on my last Self-titled EP, I felt that this message needed to be heard. What if it helps one person feel seen, loved, and safe?
Here it is, just me, the music and my octave mandolin.
When @niallhoran assigned the very deep and vulnerable song Everything I Wanted by @billieeilish for our Battle on The Voice, I knew that there was some potent medicine available in singing a song like that. The lyric, “If I could change the way that you see yourself” completely floored me.
I had touched this tender topic in my own music, in my own songs, but my song Refuge felt the most similar in tone.
I kept referring to Refuge for the courage I needed to sing this message on such a big stage. It’s wild how songs have evolutions as we continue to grow and shift. Refuge helped me to contact the depth I needed for Everything I Wanted.
Billie’s lyrics brought up a lot in me- mountains of doubt and fear around the massive leap I was about to take into the public eye! Was I ready? Had I moved through enough self- doubt to be this raw? Everything was coming up to be witnessed and loved.
And what I kept coming back to is my song Refuge. It’s wild how as a songwriter, our own songs are ultimately for us to hear first.
It was a supreme honor to sing one of Billie’s songs on that stage- especially a song that I had also heard took some time and a lot of consideration to release.
No matter what genre, I am in awe of the power that songwriting has to make us feel, release and alchemize our pain into beauty. That’s what all art does. Its absolute magic.
I hope this song helps you feel. And I hope you know just how much you are loved. YOU ARE NOT ALONE.
“I’m here, I love you and that’s all I know”
A very big thank you to @mineralsound Daniel Herman for the video and to Lyons, Co
Instrument: Fletcher Brock Octave Mandolin