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Horror Movie Rankdown 2.0 - Return of the Living Rankers


Deeee

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Cut

Willard (2003 dir. by Glen Morgan)

Disturbia (2007 dir. by D.J. Caruso)

Gravity (2013 dir. by Alfonso Cuarón)

Night of Dark Shadows (1971 dir. by Da Curtis)

Lake Placid (1999 dir. by Steve Miner)

 

Save

Hatchet II (2010 dir. by Adam Green)

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NIGHT OF DARK SHADOWS

Night+of+Dark+Shadows+(1971)+poster_02.jpg

 

I love the Dark Shadows TV show, but this movie? Ain't it. I largely blame MGM for that, as they forced Daniel Curtis to cut 35 minutes from the film in only 24 hours time, thus affecting the coherence and intensity of the movie. For those who don't know this movie, it's inspired by one of the Parallel Time storylines in the original soap opera in which Quentin Collins and his wife move into Collinswood and find themselves plagued by ghosts and spirits of his ancestors that used to be witches. As a result of the aforementioned studio mandates, reviews were middling, and the film only made half of what its predecessor made, despite the crew having more time to be invested in the finished product. Most of the deleted material has resurfaced, but unfortunately without sound. 💔 Anyway, I didn't really want to cut it this early, but I guess it's an alright cut, all things considered.

 

SAVE: Hatchet II

Edited by Elliott
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THE SHAPE'S NOMINATIONS

 

My Bloody Valentine (1981 dir. by George Mihalka)

Dead End (2003 dir. by Jean-Baptiste Andrea + Fabrice Canepa)

Behind the Mask: The Rise of Leslie Vernon (2006 dir. by Scott Glosserman)

Bug (2006 dir. by William Friedkin)

The Mist (2007 dir. by Frank Darabont)

Sunshine (2007 dir. by Danny Boyle)

Doomsday (2008 dir. by Neil Marshall)

Martyrs (2008 dir. by Pascal Laugier)

The Midnight Meat Train (2008 dir. by Ryuhei Kitamura)

Carriers (2009 dir. by Alex Pastor + David Pastor)

Grace (2009 dir. by Paul Solet)

Splice (2009 dir. by Vincenzo Natali)

The Last Exorcism (2010 dir. by Daniel Stamm)

Tucker & Dale vs. Evil (2010 dir. by Eli Craig)

The Woman (2011 dir. by Lucky McKee)

John Dies at the End (2012 dir. by Don Coscarelli)

The Gift (2015 dir. by Joel Edgerton)

The Nightmare (2015 dir. by Rodney Ascher)

Pod (2015 dir. by Mickey Keating)

Southbound (2015 dir. by Radio Silence + Roxanne Benjamin + David Bruckner + Patrick Horvath)

Pride and Prejudice and Zombies (2016 dir. by Burr Steers)

Underwater (2020 dir. by William Eubank)

Scream Blacula Scream (1973 dir. by Bob Kelljan)

Ju-on: The Grudge 2 (2003 dir. by Takashi Shimizu)

 

@aliasocfan @totes4totes @1234567890 @Zoey

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23 minutes ago, totes4totes said:

i will do this tomorrow when i'm at work staring at a powerpoint willing for it to come together in the most aesthetically pleasing way without touching it at all like that will magically work

MOOD woooow wow mood mooooooooooood

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On 7/25/2020 at 8:29 AM, Deeee said:

THE SHAPE'S NOMINATIONS

 

My Bloody Valentine (1981 dir. by George Mihalka)

Dead End (2003 dir. by Jean-Baptiste Andrea + Fabrice Canepa)

Behind the Mask: The Rise of Leslie Vernon (2006 dir. by Scott Glosserman)

Bug (2006 dir. by William Friedkin)

The Mist (2007 dir. by Frank Darabont)

Sunshine (2007 dir. by Danny Boyle)

Doomsday (2008 dir. by Neil Marshall)

Martyrs (2008 dir. by Pascal Laugier)

The Midnight Meat Train (2008 dir. by Ryuhei Kitamura)

Carriers (2009 dir. by Alex Pastor + David Pastor)

Grace (2009 dir. by Paul Solet)

Splice (2009 dir. by Vincenzo Natali)

The Last Exorcism (2010 dir. by Daniel Stamm)

Tucker & Dale vs. Evil (2010 dir. by Eli Craig)

The Woman (2011 dir. by Lucky McKee)

John Dies at the End (2012 dir. by Don Coscarelli)

The Gift (2015 dir. by Joel Edgerton)

The Nightmare (2015 dir. by Rodney Ascher)

Pod (2015 dir. by Mickey Keating)

Southbound (2015 dir. by Radio Silence + Roxanne Benjamin + David Bruckner + Patrick Horvath)

Pride and Prejudice and Zombies (2016 dir. by Burr Steers)

Underwater (2020 dir. by William Eubank)

Scream Blacula Scream (1973 dir. by Bob Kelljan)

Ju-on: The Grudge 2 (2003 dir. by Takashi Shimizu)

 

@aliasocfan @totes4totes @1234567890 @Zoey

 

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Cut:

My Bloody Valentine (1981 dir. by George Mihalka)

The Midnight Meat Train (2008 dir. by Ryuhei Kitamura)

Bug (2006 dir. by William Friedkin)

The Last Exorcism (2010 dir. by Daniel Stamm)

Pride and Prejudice and Zombies (2016 dir. by Burr Steers)

 

Save (lol I'll do Dee a favor and save a movie on his long list of movies):

Southbound (2015 dir. by Radio Silence + Roxanne Benjamin + David Bruckner + Patrick Horvath)

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29 minutes ago, totes4totes said:

Cut:

Splice (2009 dir. by Vincenzo Natali)

The Midnight Meat Train (2008 dir. by Ryuhei Kitamura)

Bug (2006 dir. by William Friedkin)

The Last Exorcism (2010 dir. by Daniel Stamm)

Pride and Prejudice and Zombies (2016 dir. by Burr Steers)

 

Save (lol I'll do Dee a favor and save a movie on his long list of movies):

Southbound (2015 dir. by Radio Silence + Roxanne Benjamin + David Bruckner + Patrick Horvath)

replaced My Bloody Valentine with Splice for @Elliott

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Pride_and_Prejudice_and_Zombies_poster.j

Pride and Prejudice and Zombies (2016 dir. by Burr Steers)

Why was this not good book made into a not good movie? Also about 4 years too late to take advantage of the zombie craze. Look at that stupid poster. At least the book cover had a sense of humor.

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BadMixedArabianoryx-small.gif

The Midnight Meat Train (2008 dir. by Ryuhei Kitamura)

I was going to save this movie but then I saw that Bradley Cooper starred in it! For all of you in the movie rankdown, you know how I feel about Bradley Cooper! So it then becomes an easy cut instead of the easy save! Let's first get this out of the way, "The Midnight Meat Train" is an ABSOLUTELY incredible title. The movie is based off a Clive Barker short story. Yes that Clive Barker whose works always get made into Horror Movies. And honestly according to reviews this is maybe the best movie adaptation of one of his stories (though Jordan Peele's Candyman may surpass it). The film follows a photographer who is trying to track down a serial killer dubbed "The Subway Butcher" and gets more than he bargains for. Anyway, maybe I will watch this someday. When I'm in the mood for a bloody massacre movie.

 

Saving: Southbound

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THE SHAPE'S NOMINATIONS

 

My Bloody Valentine (1981 dir. by George Mihalka)

Dead End (2003 dir. by Jean-Baptiste Andrea + Fabrice Canepa)

Behind the Mask: The Rise of Leslie Vernon (2006 dir. by Scott Glosserman)

The Mist (2007 dir. by Frank Darabont)

Sunshine (2007 dir. by Danny Boyle)

Doomsday (2008 dir. by Neil Marshall)

Martyrs (2008 dir. by Pascal Laugier)

Carriers (2009 dir. by Alex Pastor + David Pastor)

Grace (2009 dir. by Paul Solet)

Tucker & Dale vs. Evil (2010 dir. by Eli Craig)

The Woman (2011 dir. by Lucky McKee)

John Dies at the End (2012 dir. by Don Coscarelli)

The Gift (2015 dir. by Joel Edgerton)

The Nightmare (2015 dir. by Rodney Ascher)

Pod (2015 dir. by Mickey Keating)

Underwater (2020 dir. by William Eubank)

Scream Blacula Scream (1973 dir. by Bob Kelljan)

Ju-on: The Grudge 2 (2003 dir. by Takashi Shimizu)

 

@aliasocfan @1234567890 @Zoey

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Save: Underwater 

Cut: Scream Blacula Scream (1973 dir. by Bob Kelljan), Pod (2015 dir. by Mickey Keating), The Nightmare (2015 dir. by Rodney Ascher), The Gift (2015 dir. by Joel Edgerton), John Dies at the End (2012 dir. by Don Coscarelli)

 

Really not up to to doing the write ups right away, so if there are any objections to cuts I'll change them. 

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